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A Woman Changed

‘THERE was a time not too far back when Camilla, the new Duchess of York, was the scariest thing out there. She was worse than bird flu. She was Omar … (read more)

Posted: 7th, November 2005 | In: Broadsheets | Comment

Gigi String

‘WHEN Kerry Katona announced via the front page of OK! magazine “WE’LL HAVE A BIG WHITE WEDDING”, the printers forgot to add the addendum: “EACH.” The back of Kerry … (read more)

Posted: 7th, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Posh’s Posse

‘WITH Kate Moss’s “Moss Posse” as damaged as last year’s Ugg boots, OK! has searched around for a new girl gang. And it’s come up with “Posh’s Posse”. Round ’em … (read more)

Posted: 7th, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Focus Group

‘SAT on the sofa between John “Motty” Motson and “Mark “Lawro” Lawrenson, Tony “Tony” Blair was talking football on Football Focus, the BBC’s pre-match Saturday afternoon sports show. Tony relives … (read more)

Posted: 7th, November 2005 | In: Celebrities | Comment

M B Games

‘WE don’t get to learn what the “B” in Emma B’s name stands for, but it surely offers an insight into her career ambitions. ‘I before E but not after … (read more)

Posted: 7th, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

HEALTH WARNING

‘BE afraid. Be every afraid. And if you’re not afraid, read the Mail. It will scare you shitless. Here are a few headlines from the Mail’s week of horror stories. … (read more)

Posted: 5th, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Bum Deal

‘THERE’S safety in numbers. Here are 18 things we learned last week…0.85 – You are less likely to have a hearty attack if the ratio of your waist to your … (read more)

Posted: 5th, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Compensation Culture Vultures

‘DID you have a nasty fall at work? Did you accidentally stab yourself in the eye with a fork in the work’s canteen? Did a nasty paper cut in the … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Rear Admiral

‘ANOTHER day, another outfit. And it’s off to the States with the Mail to see an Admiral trying to walk the ever-fragrant Camilla through a window. ‘Bottoms up’ … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Cheap Skates

‘GOOD news for rail commuters. The Times says that this valiant breed is to be given cheaper season tickets. Paddington – More of a holding bay than a station … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Wade-ing In

‘MONEY makes the world go round. Or is that love? Just in case, we’ve singed a pre-nuptial agreement, and are now free to let love conquer all. ‘You should see … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

No Fear

‘REMEMBER when we were invited to stand up if we hated Manoo? Rio cost more than Neville, Beckham, Scholes, Keane, Giggs, Schmeichel, Sheringham, Cantona, Bruce, Irwin, Butt and Solskjaer … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Back pages | Comment

Power Mad

‘WITH Tony Blair’s power on the wane and David Blunkett gone for a second time, all the Conservatives need do is to sit on their hands and wait for destiny … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

The Thick Blue Line

‘MORE power to Diederik Coetzee, the cop on a mountain bike who’s just broken the record for the number of arrests made in a year. So far, he’s made 309 … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Horses Aren’t For Courses

‘THE nation sat down to breakfast on Wednesday morning to be greeted by the face of a newly-departed sporting icon. Glue-hoo … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2005 | In: Back pages | Comment

Suffer The Children

‘IS it Christmas or Xmas? It’s the big question. A pet need not be just for your Christmas … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Terminal Decline

‘AS you lay in your hospital bed, you may begin to get bored. But don’t be. You need your wits about you. Your stay in such a place is a … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Name & Number

‘“I NEED ARREST,” puns the Sun’s headline above the news of the country’ most prolific copper. If the cap fits … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Tony’s Lonely

‘FOUR more years of Tony Blair? If today’s headlines are any pointer to the Prime Minister’s future, Tony should spend part of today updating his resume. ‘I’m right behind you’ … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Hit Me, Baby

‘BABIES are not just about getting presents, decorating nurseries and mum and dad snuggling their little bundle of love and telling the world how truly amazing he/she/it is over a … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

A Greek Tragedy

‘“PARIS – IT’S WAR!” screams the Enquirer’s cover page in its familiar yellow ink. She’s already done that, Mary-Kate … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Blanket Coverage

‘WHO wouldn’t want to be a fly on the wall when Prince Charles met President Bush? ‘So which one of you is Diana?’ … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Babes In The (Holly)Wood

‘OR else Britney could buy an Emily’s Celebration of Life Doll, as featured in the National Enquirer magazine. It’s yours for just £21.50. Baby Sean … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, November 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Best End

‘“THE BEST EVER,” says the Sun’s headline in deepest black ink. “5,000 FANS SEE LEGEND COLLAPSE.” ‘Dead? What d’yer mean dead?’ … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Mr & Mrs

‘EVER since Brad Pitt met Angelina Jolie the papers have been full of rumour and speculation. ‘Got the rings?’ … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, November 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

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