Anorak

- Author Archive

Voices Of Hope

‘WE had wanted to talk about the G8 summit, global warming, poverty in Africa, that one of the anti-capitalist People’s Golfing Association went round the course on par, how one … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

London Pride

‘THAT was my city on the TV screens. I know Woburn place well. Tavistock Square is an old haunt, the café in the middle a great place to sit and … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Going For Church

‘WONDER what would have happened had Aled Jones got in touch with his wild side, talked about his drinking and dated a rugby player? Seen it … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Kerry’s Prior(it)y

‘KERRY Katona’s passage into eternal D-list fame continues apace this week as she achieves the goal of many a celebrity wannabe and checks into The Priory. Get thee … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Love & G8

‘REMEMBER G8? Sure you do. As recently as yesterday it was the big news story. Failed actors dressed as clowns against poverty To refresh your … (read more)

Posted: 7th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Camilla’s Popularity Flags

‘WHILE the Sun wraps itself in the flag to celebrate the London Olympics, the Mail says that not everyone is happy to wave it. Many happy returns, ma’am … (read more)

Posted: 7th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

French Toast

‘LONDON has only just been awarded the Olympic Games and already the negative reporting has begun. Jacques Chirac, Napoleon, Pétain, Louis Pasteur, Jeanne d’Arc, Charles Aznavour – your … (read more)

Posted: 7th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Just Desserts

‘“PASS the Louis Roederer Quartet NV, Silvio. Over here with the aubergine caviar, Jacques. Come on, fair’s fair, that’s your seventeenth spoonful.” ‘It’s a Womble’ And … (read more)

Posted: 7th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Manor Of Speaking

‘WHEN David Beckham speaks, dogs large and small prick up their ears and listen attentively. Boy in the hood And so does Tony Blair, who, as … (read more)

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Clowning Around

‘USUALLY when a helicopter is seen high above Gleneagles it’s just delivering Prince Andrew for another round of golf. Available for protests and children’s parties But … (read more)

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Living With Ken

‘“WHERE does the air come from, daddy?” asks the boy flying his kite on London’s Parliament Hill. “Why, from the exhaust fumes, of course.”Dad then goes onto explain that all … (read more)

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Revenge On The Nerd

‘SOME people cause mayhem not for political reasons but for fun. Spot the worm It’s true. Amazing as it sounds, it might just be that not … (read more)

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Salad Dressing

‘AFTER Jacques Chirac’s comments on British food yesterday, the Sun seeks to slowly pull the legs off the man it calls the original Crazy Frog. ‘Don’t worry, love, … (read more)

Posted: 6th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Laughs Sans Frontieres

‘IN the spirit of the entente cordiale, let us now say that Jacques Chirac stinks of garlic. ‘In thirty years let’s be laughing together’ And we … (read more)

Posted: 5th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Just The Ticket

‘“YOU can’t park there, sir,” comes the voice from beneath the peaked cap. “It’s a no waiting zone.” ‘And this is me giving a ticket to Michael Barrymore’ … (read more)

Posted: 5th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Anarchy In The UK

‘IF only Edinburgh had taken a leaf from Kent’s Bluewater shopping centre and banned hoodies. Just like at Notting Hill, the police get into the spirit of carnival … (read more)

Posted: 5th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

One From The Top

‘AFTERNOONS are not what they once were now Richard Whiteley’s been beaten by the clock. B is for Boyzone The unemployed, postal workers, residents in rest … (read more)

Posted: 5th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Child’s Play

‘AS if children in the Mail didn’t have enough to worry about with paedophiles hiding in the computer and turkey twizzlers that eat your brains, they are now being told … (read more)

Posted: 5th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Plenty To Shout! About

‘HAVING spent a large chunk of the Hello! budget on the Owen wedding, Hello! still needs to fill some pages in its esteemed publication. Still shouting … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Owen’s Goal

‘REMEMBER when OK! told us Michael Owen’s wedding was to be a low-key affair, how Michael and his beloved have “kept quiet” about their marriage (see Faking The Michael)? … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Giving Him Ten

‘PRINCESS Diana was spinning in her grave last week – and if Simone Simmons’s revelations are based on any truth, she may not have been doing it alone.For in death, … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Broadsheets | Comment

Live & Death

‘HAND up who went to Live 8. Rock until your TV drops Put your hands down, you fools – and put that lighter out. I … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Celebrities | Comment

We Are Sailing

‘UNHAPPILY, no number of Live 8 concerts could make room for Mike Batt and his protest song of a generation, Remember You’re A Womble. Bobbing Around … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Tony The Homey

‘“WAVE your mother*******” hands in the air if Tony is your homey.” Motherf*** the vote The invitation may not have the slickness of an Alastair Campbell … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

The Woldu Emotion

‘THE Star is not known for its insightful reporting on global events, unless it involves a football tournament or a wet thong contest in Faliraki. One million… … (read more)

Posted: 4th, July 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Contact Us Writers