Anorak

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The Show Bomber

‘WE dread to think what Russell Crowe would do should he ever audition for the role of Osama bin Laden in any biopic of the bearded lunatic. … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Fame At Last

‘ANORAK has achieved fame. And we didn’t have to sing on TV and flash our knickers on Big Brother to be noticed.In last weekend’s Sunday Times (5 June 2005), we … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

The Colours Of Money

‘DID anyone have the same dream as me? In my dream, Spurs fans complained that money was now running and ruining the game? ‘My agent says I can … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Back pages | Comment

Fischer Of Men

‘THAT Jack Straw has a tricky job is indisputable. It’s not easy being Foreign Secretary and taking orders from two men, Tony Blair and George Bush. ”I give … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Not Newsworthy

‘HERE is the news, brought to you by nice hair, straight white teeth and a smouldering set of bedroom eyes. ”Bong! Natasha Kaplinsky wears new jacket. Bong! Fiona … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Casting Call

‘RUSSELL Crowe is fast emerging as the most likely candidate to reprise the role of ET, the foreigner who badly wanted to phone home. ”I wanna call Eliot” … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Warts And All

‘MARY’S reaction to being ranked the least popular member of the Big Brother house was contrary to what we’d expected, and hoped for. Mary took it well … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2005 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Fatter, Fitter, Faster

‘BEFORE Posh steps on the treadmill in an effort to make her buttocks as full as that woman’s who was, apparently, seen kissing her husband at the weekend, she should … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

The Kiss

‘“DO you know the brunette?” asks the Sun. The paper wants anyone who can identify the woman seen kissing David Beckham for “15-20 seconds” last weekend to get in touch. … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Twin Towns

‘REPETITION, repetition, repetition – it’s everywhere. It’s everywhere. Newbury – twinned with Winchester, Cheltenham, Exeter, Clapham… If it’s not Tony Blair’s tape getting jammed, it’s yet … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Going The Distance

‘ON the face of it, £1.30 to drive a mile in a city at rush hour sounds like a steep price to pay – until we look at the background … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

A Fairy Tale

‘AT last! If the shoe fits We’ve waited what seems like an age, but now we can say we were there when Francine Lewis tied … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Fashion Policed

‘REBELLION is a dish best served young. Oliver Letwin There is little worse than seeing a middle-aged man with a hoody and a Crazy Frog … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

It Is Art

‘“TURNER prize shocker,” screams the Telegraph on its cover page. “The favourite is a woman who paints flowers. Whatever next?” You can just make out the dead shark … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Milking It

‘JUST saying the words Kym Marsh and Jack Ryder is enough to bring even the most intrepid type out in a sweat rash. Milking it for all it’s … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Mad For It

‘TO a rousing chorus of “I’m Mad Me”, the thirteen contestants in this year’s Big Brother TV show parade their near-naked talent before the world. X and … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

The Bad Book

‘YOU’RE in a hospital bed, waiting for the premed sedative to kick in, when your conscience pricks your anxious mind. ‘And on the 7th day, while resting, God … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Spice World

‘WILL it be “Yes” or will it be “No”? It’s not yet been put to a public vote, and the decision on the biggest news of last week has yet … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Broadsheets | Comment

Black List

‘ALL week long the papers have been playing a game of will they, won’t they? This year’s black Now adding his weight to the call … (read more)

Posted: 3rd, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

The British Are Coming

‘LAST night, the first season of Desperate Housewives ended in the UK, and a hole was left in our scheduled lives. You couldn’t make it up … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Water Log

‘CURSE Tony Blair’s weather machine. No sooner has he settled into another stint to prime ministering than he’s turned the taps off. Let them drink beer … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, June 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Hidden Depths

‘SCARY Mary, the white witch with the heavy black eyeliner, has yet to be strapped to a stool and thrown into the Big Brother pool to see if she’s sinks … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, June 2005 | In: Celebrities | Comment

On A Promise

‘HAVING already made the mistake of thinking Abi Titmuss a slapper, the world is now reeling with the news that neither is Big Brother’s Lesley. Lesley as Abi … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Forever Young

‘WE may never learn what Penny Lancaster sees in multi-millionaire showbiz legend Rod Stewart, but today we do at least get to know what he sees in her: a baby. … (read more)

Posted: 2nd, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Code Of Conduct

‘WE are all of us looking for meaning. ”It’s a crazy plan, but it just might work” In the Mail, Bobby Freeman was cooking breakfast … (read more)

Posted: 1st, June 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

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