Anorak

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Topic Of Cancer

‘“STARS ARE BACKING HER EVERY WAY,” shouts the Sun, as they return to the biggest story of the week – their pink wristbands in support of Kylie’s battle with breast … (read more)

Posted: 19th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


An Unfair Cop

‘“HE’S late for his tea!” said Mr Rogers as he handed over three and fourpence for his usual pouch of Old Imperial pouch tobacco. No PC Plod … (read more)

Posted: 19th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Right Sexy

‘“WHY Tory men will always have more VA-VA-VOOM!” reveals the Daily Mail. Back to basics But this is nothing to do with speeding policemen. It’s Edwina … (read more)

Posted: 19th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Call Girls

‘“HI, I’m Steph. A hot blonde, a perfect 10… and I fiddle my benefits.” You alright in there Wayne? Well, pleased to meet you, Steph. And … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Reality Love

‘EVERY cloud has a silver lining, and the Kylie story has allowed the papers to quietly sideline their Love Island coverage. Tonight Peter and Jordan will be watching … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


She Should Be So Plucky

‘NO prizes for guessing the lead story in today’s tabloids, with the news of Kylie’s breast cancer diagnosis. Time to think of Kylie’s breasts The papers … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Old Bags

‘THE British way of life is under attack. ”For a novel change, spice up your cuppa with an enlivening dash of gin” The nation is … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Banding Together

‘WHILE the enemy are venous, shadowy and murderous, our brave British boys are game lads out for a good time and a bit of a giggle. ”And … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


By George!

‘RESISTING any urge to dress up in the garb of Iraq’s Revolutionary Command Council, George Galloway opted for a sober dark suit as he appeared on Capitol Hill before a … (read more)

Posted: 18th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Oil Be Back

‘SO oily is George Galloway MP, the man often called the Right Honourable Member for Baghdad Central, that it’s a wonder the Americans haven’t invaded him. Spot … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Nice Try

‘DURING Prince Harry’s 2003 “working trip” to Australia, he was criticised for taking advantage of the happy coincidence that the so-called “rugby world cup” was taking place there at the … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Top Trumps

‘IF the best way to look better is to be seen with people uglier than yourself, why did Donald Trump marry Melania? Lagerfeld has a talent for making … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment


Lip Service

‘GORDON Ramsay, erstwhile “rudest man on TV”, is up to his tricks again. Fructose how he gets away with it He has defied attempts by TV … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Loos Women

‘WE All know that the Sun and Star will be salivating over the ins and outs at Love Island, but how will the “quality” tabloid be treating events? … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Making No Census

‘IF you thought the Anorak poll was invasive, just wait until you get the 2011 census form slipped under your door in the dead of night. A typical … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Road Rage

‘THE new Range Rover Sport is the Andy Fordham of the sports car world. ”Oi! Get orf my Land Rover!” Like the hulking darts player, the … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Beckham Bashing

‘ELLE Macpherson is blessed. After having the good fortune to find her image pasted in Hello!’s pages alongside that of Karl Lagerfeld, there she is now in close proximity to … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment


Baby Bluebloods

‘IF we say Mary, Letizia, Mette-Marit, Maxima and Mathilde, what would you say in reply? A princess “Pardon”, indeed. Or rather, make that a “Royal … (read more)

Posted: 17th, May 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment


Nice Little Learners

‘THEY say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks but in the case of Dot Branning that might not be true. Since meeting her new driving instructor, Mr Rawlins … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Old Splice

‘WHAT do we look like when we’ve died? A junior doctor could tell us that we look like an “O” (mouth open) or a “Q” (mouth open, tongue lolled out). … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Ride On Sally

‘THIS week, Cilla and Les have decided to get married. As ideas go, it’s up there with: “Let’s invade Iraq!” There were no takers even when Les … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Back For More

‘CANCEL the papers. Turn off the TV news. Place the carrier pigeon in a pot on gas mark 3 for an hour. Anorak is back!Not everything is yet in place … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment


Devil In Disguise

‘ELVIS Presley’s pelvic gyrations were considered so shocking in uptight 1950s America that TV cameramen were famously instructed to show him only from the waist up. ”You ain’t … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment


Travellers’ Check

‘IF you want to know how well this country is doing, you can forget house prices, inflation and the cost of a Bacardi Breezer and see how many of us … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment


Born To Booze

‘“I’LL SAVE YOU, GAZZA,” says the Star. Or rather, says Chris Evans, for the copper-headed funster has extended the hand of friendship to his “troubled pal” Paul Gascoigne, and offered … (read more)

Posted: 16th, May 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment